When I die, the funeral should not be long. Anything over 45 minutes is too long. I don’t want anybody nodding off and hitting the pew in front of them. Plenty of that happens in church already.
It’s easy for me to laugh at myself. It can be almost as easy to laugh at my religion when you consider:
I can’t stay up so late anymore. My wife is considering renting my side of the bed to the dog.
So what about the swine flu. This man had Serious Dad Disorder.
They watched last night, still not willing to give up hope.
Sometime around 9:30 p.m. another update came into the war room.
“Mom, this came in from a from a homeless guy, who heard it from Aunt Bea, who got it from an AIG executive on his way to the airport. They think there’s probably no school [...]
Caught you comparing families again, didn’t I?
They have a high school junior who just finished her college master’s thesis. Yours just failed her GED again.
They hand out lab coats and sterile foot covers before you get in their showroom-new minivan. You keep a shovel to clean out your garbage, often uncovering one of your kids [...]
