Is This Mike On?

I wish I could fly like Superman but I would probably get really sick and lose my lunch over Dallas. Come to think of it, that’s not a bad thing.

I wish somebody would invent a warning bell before I speak to my wife. Make lights flash or dogs bark before I say something stupid again.

I wish employees would not talk over you in line. I don’t care about your rotten shifts or your boss who could star in Devil Wears Prada. Either does the guy who’s been unemployed for six months next to me. He would love to endure your rotten climate-controlled conditions with those union-mandated breaks every three hours.

I wish store workers would not point and say “over there” when I ask them where to find the mayo.

I wish I didn’t have had that apple fritter this morning for breakfast.

I wish for an easy button that simply says “because I said so” when you press it. Are you listening Staples?

I wish when people ask “how are you doing,” they really mean it.

I wish tomatoes from the store actually had some taste.

I wish writing came easier to me. But then it wouldn’t be worthwhile when I finish.

I wish I was coordinated enough to be a paramedic. But you wouldn’t want me to give an IV at the back of an ambulance going 50 miles per hour.

I wish I wouldn’t think of more things to wish for when I’m done writing this.

Tweet This Post